Yesterday I had my weekly dialectical behavioural therapy (DBT) group Zoom session from 9:00-10:30pm, and afterwards I binge- watched a few more Breaking Bad episodes while chatting with friends over text messages. I’m a little groggy this morning from having stayed up late. My weekly SuperValu grocery order is scheduled for delivery between 10:30am-12:30pm, and while I’m waiting I complete my usual morning routine — brief mindfulness practice, breakfast, reading/watching news on my iPad. The groceries are delivered around 11:15am by the same guy who’s shown up for the past few weeks. It’s a smaller order, so I’m able to haul all the bags up to the apartment in one trip. I had expected the usual call from SuperValu around 8:30am to go over substitutions for unavailable items, but my phone stayed silent and only 1 item ended up being out of stock.
After putting groceries away and washing dishes, I settle in with my laptop to update my career to-do list with some new job postings and download various tax forms received and scanned by my mailbox service. I’m expecting another high tax bill this past year due to multiple factors — some independent contractor income, opting out of any withholding for California unemployment benefits, and cashing out a retirement account. I set aside working on my taxes for another day, but now my thoughts turn to my personal finances and budget. There are a few recurring expenses I’ve been meaning to track down, one of which is a premium subscription for my LinkedIn account. So I log into LinkedIn, and as I’m pulling up my account details, I notice it includes a list of people who have viewed my profile in the last 90 days. I recognise most of the viewers as colleagues with whom I’ve been in touch recently and/or potential employers — no surprises there — but then I see a former long-time friend in SF had checked out my profile and surely saw that I am now in Dublin. This triggers some strong emotions… I had removed this person from my LinkedIn network after not speaking with them since 2017, and seeing that they had viewed my profile not only brings up hurt from the past but also feels like an invasion of my privacy.
This wave of strong emotions seems like a good opportunity for me to practice the skills we’re covering right now in my DBT group around emotional regulation. In fact, our assignment for this next week is to go over some worksheets that are designed for emotionally triggering events like this. Going through the DBT materials and writing out some responses to the worksheets help me gain some perspective on the emotions that have come up and, most importantly, some techniques to manage them more effectively. It’s still a draining experience, and I’m also getting hungry (which certainly isn’t helping), so I decide to close my laptop and break for lunch. My mood calls for some comfort food — grilled ham and cheese sandwiches (well, technically they’re air-fried in the mini oven) — and I definitely feel better after eating.
The afternoon is quickly passing by, so I decide to get in some steps for the day before it gets any later. It’s much chillier out today with highs in the mid 40s F / upper single digits C. I decide to do a short walk to Dublin Castle where I immerse myself in some photography.
A rear view of the castle complex from the garden:
The Chapel Royal, with closeups of 30 sculpted heads depicting religious and other important figures in Irish history that adorn either side of each of gothic windows:
A closeup of a carved designed in one of the castle walls:
Closeups of some plants:
